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November 9, 2011

The Top 5 “Myths and Truths” About Online Dating for 50-Plus Singles

Filed under: dating, myth, online, people, romantic, single, singles, truth — Tags: dating, myth, online, people, romantic, single, singles, truth — admin @ 8:21 am

Even with countless singles joining online dating sites every day, many people are still unsure about this method of meeting. Today OurTime.com, the largest online dating community catering to singles over 50, announced the top five most common misconceptions about online dating. To debunk the myths and learn the truth, site staff turned to OurTime.com’s official Relationship Expert, Dr. Gail Saltz.

“Many singles over 50 are either afraid to get back into the dating game or believe there is still a stigma attached to online dating,” said Dr. Saltz. “We wanted to do some myth-busting and set the record straight. Not only is this one of the most fulfilling times of a person’s life, finding a companion to share it with is easier than you might think – especially if you use online dating to your advantage.”

Below are the top five “Myths” and corresponding “Truths” about online dating for singles over 50.

“Most single people are much younger than me – it’s much harder to find people my age.”

Truth: The truth is that there are many more potential mates out there than people think. According to 2010 U.S. Census data, almost 30 percent of the 78 million Baby Boomers are single. Every day, thousands of those single Boomers venture online to find companionship. And unlike the average social event or stroll through the grocery store, everyone in an online dating setting is single and looking to meet someone.

“I should wait to join a dating site until I’m ready to get married again.”

Truth: The 50-plus singles polled in a recent national survey tend to be less interested in marriage than they are in companionship and long-term relationships. Helping to relieve the pressure to marry is the fact that singles in this stage of life are generally free of the expectations of child rearing and career advancement. This allows them to approach dating from a more relaxed perspective. Their main objective is simply to live life to the fullest, and to find someone to share the good times with.

“Online dating is risky.”

Truth: Dr. Saltz tells singles that whether they met online or in the real world, keeping a few simple tips in mind will ensure a safe and positive experience. For starters, always meet in public and drive yourself to and from the first few meetings; tell a friend about your plans for the date; Google your date’s name in advance to see what comes up; limit your drinking and don’t do anything that would impair your judgment; and finally, listen to your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, just move on. The right person for you is out there somewhere.

“Online dating is expensive and takes a lot of time and energy.”

Truth: Some of its main advantages are that online dating is efficient, convenient and cost-effective. You can take things at your own pace, from the comfort of your home, at any hour of the day or night. This allows you to expand your pool of potential matches and be in control of when, where and how you meet other singles. Membership costs at OurTime.com average less than $5 dollars per week. That’s less than many people spend on coffee!

Meeting interesting new people and finding a romantic partnership are great ways to support one’s overall health and happiness (read: increase energy!). A whopping 97 percent of OurTime.com users agree that romantic relationships are good for one’s health. And 93 percent agree that having a romantic relationship is an important part of overall happiness.

“People will judge me if they know I am dating online.”

Truth: These days, everyone knows someone who met their mate online. And the results are often extremely positive: one in five new relationships and one in six new marriages began with an Internet date. In the last year, the number of dating site users 50 years of age or older has grown twice as rapidly as any other age group (comScore). The OurTime.com community has experienced astonishing membership growth of more than 400 percent over the last two years, becoming the leader in 50-plus dating. Almost 10,000 people join each day. Friends and family will be thrilled to learn that you are actively seeking companionship, in a new way that works for you.

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August 28, 2011

Odds For Sex Are Best On Wednesdays

Filed under: course, data, evening, index, measures, night, okcupid, people, singles — Tags: course, data, evening, index, measures, night, okcupid, people, singles — admin @ 7:34 pm

By Rosa Golijan

Most of us tend to schedule our dates on Friday or Saturday nights, but it turns out that if we’re looking for some — ahem — action we should meet up with our potential bed partners on Wednesdays.

The New York Times reports that dating site OKCupid has come up with something it’s calling the “sexual availability index” after collecting data from its users. According to the site’s co-founder Christian Rudder, this index is “not unlike the Dow, if the stock market were about sex.”

Why should you care about this index? Because it tells you when your odds of ending the night with a naughty snuggle buddy are best:

Rudder started by finding out, based on OkCupid’s mobile service, which customers in New York, Boston and Washington were out on the town on a given night. From these people’s profile data, Rudder then built a composite of four sets of personal characteristics that might correlate with openness toward new (but not necessarily long-lasting) relationships.

Two measures he studied were explicitly concerned with sex: what percentage of singles out on a given evening listed casual sex as a “romantic priority” and what percentage was willing to sleep with someone on a first date. The other two measures were less sex-centric: what percentage described themselves as extroverted and what percentage fancied themselves as adventurous.

When he put all the numbers together, he got a curious result. Weekdays, not weekends, are better for singles on the prowl — and the mix of people out on Wednesday nights are the friskiest. (The least surprising bit of data is that someone’s chances of success increase over the course of an evening.)

Of course there’s no good way to check how accurate this data is — unless Rudder were to reach out to every OKCupid user and ask whether or not they had sex on any particular night. But based on an informal survey of bartenders by New York Times writer Nate Silver, you should consider setting aside a few Wednesday nights and trying your luck.

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August 9, 2011

The Rules of Engagement

Filed under: call, date, dating, facebook, friend, match, phone, singles, women — Tags: call, date, dating, facebook, friend, match, phone, singles, women — admin @ 9:30 am

With more than 105 million singles in the United States, or one-third of the population, the singles scene remains a competitive playing field. Match.com, the leading online dating network, has taken an in-depth look at the behavior of singles and uncovered new dating habits based on a groundbreaking study of more than 5,000 single Americans. This unprecedented research has found that, while some traditional dating do’s and don’ts still exist, the playing field has definitely changed.

“It’s important for singles to know that the dating rules have changed,” says Whitney Casey, Relationship Expert for Match.com. “This study finds that dating behaviors drastically differ between the ages. Younger singles are more likely to friend their date on Facebook, communicate by text after a date, and be evasive about their availability if they’re not interested in a second date. Whereas older singles are more cautious when it comes to dating in the digital era.”

Specific highlights include:

Tradition Still Applies – Men, women still expect you to make the first move and ask a lady out, and although 41% of women would offer to pick up the check on a first date, a majority of men (37%) still feel they should foot the bill.

Bailout Plan – Both men and women agree that 15 minutes into the date is long enough to tell if there is chemistry (31%). However, if the date isn’t going as planned, only 12% of singles would actually call it a night and leave within the first 30 minutes of the date.

Thanks, but No Thanks – If your date isn’t getting the hint that you aren’t a match made in heaven, most singles feel that honesty is the best policy. 52% of those surveyed agree you should politely explain you aren’t interested, followed by 24% of singles who recommend being evasive about your future availability. However, younger singles are most likely to ignore your calls and send you straight to voicemail.

Too Fast on a First Date? – 6.5% of singles claim they have frequently had sex on the first date, while 80% of singles disapprove of ending the date between the sheets.

Making the Call – 48% of women prefer men to make the follow up call after the first date. Only 6% of men follow up within the first 24 hours, while the majority of men (68%) will play it cool and pick up the phone between one to three days after the date.

There’s No Place Like Phone – Although 64% of singles are open to having post-date conversations via text and email, more than 80% of singles still prefer conversations on the phone.

To Friend or Not to Friend? – Younger singles (ages 21-34) think it’s OK to add a date as a Facebook friend after 2-3 dates (26%), while 11% of singles between the ages of 35-44 wait to friend a date on Facebook until it becomes an exclusive relationship.

Meet the Guys – Yes, it is OK to introduce your new romantic interest to the ones who know you best. Men are more likely to introduce someone they’re interested in to their friends within the first month of dating than women are, regardless of their age group (nearly 50% of men vs. 35% of women).

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August 20, 2010

Online Relationships Work From Free Dating Services

Filed under: dating, online, single — Tags: contact, date, dating, free, looking, meet, online, people, person, register, relationships, services, single, singles, site, sites, websites — admin @ 10:25 am

Single people usually gather at the bars to seek dates. This is the old traditional way to find dates. In the new way, single men seeking women at a free dating service because it is easy and costless. In fact, free online dating services have been emerged that help to create many online relationships. If you are a new single person who does not know anything about online dating services, then you should read some articles to understand about the service. Generally speaking, you create your personal ad by introducing about yourself. You can post your photo if you want to. In your description of your profile, you can write the likes and dislikes. Online dating services have other singles like you who post their personals dating ads. Either you or other singles can contact with each other when a match is found.

Many online relationships are generated by first met at these free online dating websites. Single women looking for men register their profiles at these sites. After a single woman found her date, she leaves the site. By this time, she can communicate with her date through phone, email, or other means. This rule applies the same for a single man. Sometimes, you contact with a single person and do not get a reply back, you need to understand that this one is seeing someone right now. This single lady may not want to delete her profile yet because she may come back to the dating site looking new single men, if the current relationship does not work out.

Free dating services are great because many online marriages created in recent years. It is so popular that most of famous websites have personal ads, including Yahoo, MSN, AOL, and others. There are single people everywhere. Singles keep looking for their dream mates at these dating sites. So, you will see new faces of singles who register at these free dating services every day. Online dating site is a fun place to seek dates. You can find a date online at the comfort of your computer, in the living room, in the bedroom, and every where in your house. For just a few clicks of your computer mouse, thousands of singles showing up in front of you like a movie.

Many singles worry whether online relationships last long? Statistics show that a compatible relationship that you meet online always lasts for long, compare with a date you meet at the bars or nightclubs. The main reason is online singles look carefully at the others’ personal ads before making decision to contact them. A person you meet at the bar is usually happened by the sexual attract between two single people. That’s why free online dating websites create long term relationships and marriages.

Meeting an online date is easy and simple. All you have to do is to register at these free online dating sites and then start dating. Your other dream mate is waiting online to meet you so taking action right now is a must.

Wie zu lesen Body Language

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March 3, 2010

Looking For Love? Keep An Open Mind

Filed under: dating, hook, online, people, singles — Tags: bars, change, date, dating, find, hook, husband, know, master, meet, mother, online, partner, people, person, phone, place, public, relationship, shift, single, singles, social, suggests, work, worker, years — admin @ 6:35 pm

After her divorce five years ago, Lisa Hook re-entered the dating world, unsure of what she’d find.

As a single working mother, Hook said she didn’t have time for bars or singles clubs. So she concentrated her efforts on reputable online singles sites.

“I’m not going to say it wasn’t scary at first,” said Hook, 45, a Rochester mother of two who works in publishing. “Everything was so different. It’s challenging with all the new media.”

Christie Laabs, 26, of Sterling Heights said her age group has a different problem.

“When we go out, people don’t talk to each other at bars,” says Laabs, who does freelance production work for Comcast’s Dating on Demand video dating service. “It’s not like on TV, where someone comes up and starts talking to you. People tend to just hang out in their own groups.”

Hook said all this leaves her wishing for an easy solution.

“It would be wonderful to just lock eyes and meet someone at Dairy Queen,” she said. “But I know that’s not going to happen.”

She’s right, said Shirley Bavonese, a licensed marriage and family therapist, who with her husband, Joe, cofounded and directs Relationship Institute in Royal Oak and Livonia. In an age of e-mail and texts, many singles expect instant results, but that won’t happen.

“You have to put some work into it,” said Bavonese, adding people often put more time into choosing a car than a date.

“The bottom line is if your goal is a lifetime partner, it’s going to take a while to find that person. Quick date, take a class, join a social club, but … put yourself out there.”

With the advent of online dating, there are more choices than ever, said Bavonese, who met her husband of 15 years through singles ads. Yet, Hook said online dating can be a “double-edged sword” for busy people.

“It increases the dating pool a thousandfold,” Hook said. “On the other hand, the competition is also increased. Or you might click online, and then meet and the chemistry’s not there.”

Bavonese suggests if you meet someone interesting, get offline quickly so you can get to know the person.

“As soon as you can, shift to a phone call, then to a meeting in a public place,” said Bavonese, a master social worker who also runs singles workshops.

Another big mistake is being overly picky, Bavonese said. She suggests making a list of what you’re looking for in a partner, with the top three qualities being lifelong ones that are absolute.

“Tall, dark and handsome will change,” she said. “What doesn’t change is kind, compassionate and willing to negotiate.”

Bavonese said before you begin lamenting the lack of decent men or women, examine if you have what it takes for a long-term relationship.

“You only draw people to you as healthy emotionally as you are,” she says. “You need to be a full person and happy with who you are if you’re going to look for a partner to complement you.”

That means it’s not only OK to be single, but imperative to take time between relationships.

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