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August 9, 2011

The Rules of Engagement

Filed under: call, date, dating, facebook, friend, match, phone, singles, women — Tags: , , , , , , , , — admin @ 9:30 am

With more than 105 million singles in the United States, or one-third of the population, the singles scene remains a competitive playing field. Match.com, the leading online dating network, has taken an in-depth look at the behavior of singles and uncovered new dating habits based on a groundbreaking study of more than 5,000 single Americans. This unprecedented research has found that, while some traditional dating do’s and don’ts still exist, the playing field has definitely changed.

“It’s important for singles to know that the dating rules have changed,” says Whitney Casey, Relationship Expert for Match.com. “This study finds that dating behaviors drastically differ between the ages. Younger singles are more likely to friend their date on Facebook, communicate by text after a date, and be evasive about their availability if they’re not interested in a second date. Whereas older singles are more cautious when it comes to dating in the digital era.”

Specific highlights include:

Tradition Still Applies – Men, women still expect you to make the first move and ask a lady out, and although 41% of women would offer to pick up the check on a first date, a majority of men (37%) still feel they should foot the bill.

Bailout Plan – Both men and women agree that 15 minutes into the date is long enough to tell if there is chemistry (31%). However, if the date isn’t going as planned, only 12% of singles would actually call it a night and leave within the first 30 minutes of the date.

Thanks, but No Thanks – If your date isn’t getting the hint that you aren’t a match made in heaven, most singles feel that honesty is the best policy. 52% of those surveyed agree you should politely explain you aren’t interested, followed by 24% of singles who recommend being evasive about your future availability. However, younger singles are most likely to ignore your calls and send you straight to voicemail.

Too Fast on a First Date? – 6.5% of singles claim they have frequently had sex on the first date, while 80% of singles disapprove of ending the date between the sheets.

Making the Call – 48% of women prefer men to make the follow up call after the first date. Only 6% of men follow up within the first 24 hours, while the majority of men (68%) will play it cool and pick up the phone between one to three days after the date.

There’s No Place Like Phone – Although 64% of singles are open to having post-date conversations via text and email, more than 80% of singles still prefer conversations on the phone.

To Friend or Not to Friend? – Younger singles (ages 21-34) think it’s OK to add a date as a Facebook friend after 2-3 dates (26%), while 11% of singles between the ages of 35-44 wait to friend a date on Facebook until it becomes an exclusive relationship.

Meet the Guys – Yes, it is OK to introduce your new romantic interest to the ones who know you best. Men are more likely to introduce someone they’re interested in to their friends within the first month of dating than women are, regardless of their age group (nearly 50% of men vs. 35% of women).

March 29, 2010

Interpreting DIY Blind Dating Red Fags

Filed under: date, flags, woman — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , — admin @ 1:28 pm

Do-it-yourself (DIY) blind dating has become one of the most popular ways of meeting people via social networking. It is easy to set up a date over Facebook or Myspace, but the problem is that a woman on a blind date doesn’t really know who or what is going to show up when she actually meets the date. When a meeting finally occurs, the person may look “normal”, but once he starts talking it can be a completely different story.

After a few strike outs, optimism takes a backseat and a person just hopes the date she’d agreed to meet for coffee over Facebook is not some sort of serial killer. The days of grandma setting her granddaughter up with her pyromaniac next door neighbor are over, welcome to dating 2.0. Here are some red flags interpreted that will help weed out the freaks.

He Arrives to the Date Appearing Disheveled, Confused and Late

What’s the excuse for a man that is late, unkempt and looking like a wild-eyed serial killer? He is a serial killer, or a hobo, that’s what. Bonus points if he is wearing clothing with visible blood, puke, urine, dirt or is filthy in general. Get out of there as quickly as possible, and make sure he doesn’t follow.

He Uses the Terms “Leet”, “Alliance”, “Horde” or “Noob” In Casual Conversation

This is a sure sign of an online MMORPG (Massively-Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game) player. Expect to take a backseat to raids, prepubescent boys using the handle “Macdaddyninjatroll”, and having a partner in general. In a worst-case-scenario, he blows all his money to on fake Warcraft (which he will call “WOW”) in-game gold to buy a mount for his Tauren Shaman. Unless playing an MMORPG is a personal hobby, this is not a guy worth dating.

He Lies About His Age

When a silver fox shows up instead of a 25 year-old man, there is a problem. No matter how hip or “with it” (he will use this term) he claims to be, just remember that he had to lie to get a date. This is never a good sign. Tell grandpa to troll the senior’s homes instead of Myspace.

He Calls His Mother “Mommy”

He is a mama’s boy. He will want meals cooked, laundry done, and sit on his butt until someone richer, hotter, or with a lower self esteem comes along.

He Talks About “Yilfing”

He’s a furry. Run! There is a subculture of anthropomorphism where people dress up like sports team mascots and animal costumes that would make the Easter Bunny at the mall cry. Call it a fetish, and don’t get involved.

He Eats With His Mouth Open

He is a slob and probably lives in grandma’s basement because mommy kicked them out. If he doesn’t have enough respect to uses general etiquette that says it all.

He Claims to be a Hipster, But It’s Just a Cover for Why He Doesn’t Have a Car or Job

This means he is possibly lazy, has a DUI and cannot legally drive, can’t afford McDonald’s and will crash on friends couches for as long as he can milk it, if given the chance.

He Has “Eager Beaver” Syndrome

He wants to move in by the end of the date. He is disgustingly complimentary and will do anything to please. He is desperate and has not been in a relationship for five years. Do not be fooled; his charm is dependent on hooking a woman. Once hooked, he will use crafty tactics to keep a woman, and call constantly. This kind of man is hard to shake off, so stay away.

He Insults the Waiter at the Restaurant

Two words: control freak. This is also called “It puts the lotion in the basket” syndrome. When he is not roid raging at the waiter, his woman will be the target. These men are often abusive and use fear and guilt into making their women complacent. Do not pass go with this one.

Stay Cautious and Look for Flags

DIY blind dating can expand man options past those of traditional dating, but it can also pave the way for freaks to get their foot in the door. No matter how nice a guy may seem online, an in-person meeting can determine if he is dating material.

Be aware and go with a gut instinct. If something doesn’t seem right or add up, go with it. Never give out any personal information, like an address, workplace, or school, and always arrange to meet at a neutral location. There are plenty of men out there, even if it seems like there aren’t. Time is the key. Date a variety of men and see what happens, and don’t settle.

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